It is the end of summer. The golden sun filters through clouds and reflects on a pond, a glimmering silver. Above me, Spanish moss hangs like a wizard’s beard from a giant oak stooping over me, centuries old. The green cathedral canopy against the blue sky has been an unfamiliar sight of late. I lean back comfortably in this deep wrought-iron chair, and realize that this is the first moment where I was not consumed in an investigation and writing a report.

I imagine this is an experience akin to a prisoner completing a sentence and drinking in the outside world for the first time after captivity. I close my eyes and smile. The tension in my shoulders eases. Jefferson Island, where I’m relaxing, has somehow made it seem I’m a million miles away from everything, isolated in this little piece of serenity. It’s a welcome reward after the many hours of hard labor that I poured into addressing a customer’s issue.

Out of all the customer issues I have addressed, this one had the most significance. A team of talented people worked with me to understand and correct the situation, and I’m very grateful for all their efforts. Being around capable individuals is always stimulating, and sometimes the worst situations bring out the brilliance and generosity in people.

Story update 4/3/2013: The author replaced his earlier chart example with an explanation of how to set up an Xbar chart.

Unlike the difficult "third album," the one that is supposed to be a real challenge following the first two musical productions, my third album in the Seven Quality Tools suite is quite easy to compose. Why? Because I'm fortunate in having access to the vast swathes of research that many statisticians have contributed about the control chart, which is the subject of this column.

If you haven't read part one of my Improvement Ninja series, don't worry. Unlike The Godfather Part II, you don't need to see the preceding installment to make sense of this article. I continue my journey to enlighten newly initiated quality colleagues by discussing the check sheet, which is the second quality tool of the seven recognized by the American Society for Quality (ASQ).

For those not in the know about the seven quality tools, they are:
1. Cause and effect diagram
2. Check sheet
3. Control charts
4. Histogram
5. Pareto chart
6. Scatter diagram
7. Stratification

Granted, I will probably struggle as I talk about check sheets, partly because they may seem so simple and obvious. They are, but sometimes we need to discuss the obvious because to some, it might not be.

This is a true exposé from Santa’s mega-factory at the North Pole. The information, apparently smuggled out in a series of notes rolled into scrolls and tucked deep inside elf shoes, was found floating in the open stretches of water known as the North Pole Passage. You may not be aware that elf shoes, with their curled-up toes and red bell on the tip, make very good buoyancy devices, a fact that could prove useful in situations where you cannot access a life vest and you are only wearing novelty footwear.

The notes, all written by hand in a delicate script, were never signed; however, experts involved in their analysis nicknamed the anonymous author the “Grumpy Quality Elf” (GQE). This mysterious journalist captivated the attention of many academics of prestigious universities across the land, all seeking to understand the secrets behind the production processes found in the most remote and desolate factory on earth.